Daydream

Today I kept falling asleep in class. I had a little dream each time, sort of half in, half out of sleep. Every time, the dream was about her, in some way or another. Sometimes I'll drift off and then when I realize I have drifted off, I realize that I was just daydreaming about her. Is it obsession, or natural train of thought? I don't know, but it doesn't really matter, I can't help it.

I wish I was pretty ballsie and could just go up and kiss her, but I'm way to scared. There's no telling how she would react, it could go either way, and I'm too stingy to bet all my money on one hand. Maybe with some other girl, that didn't matter as much to me, but not with her. I can't exactly afford to screw it up if I don't catch the Ace.

I'm Tired...

I'm tired of a lot of shit. I'm sorry, but I'm about to let loose, so any young kids out there might want to skip this one. Also sorry for bitching and moaning, but I just feel like it. I'm so tired of some people being around all the damn time. All the time! I can't get away, and it wouldn't be so bad if I could get away, but I can't. I wish I could just spend the evening with her, but he's always there too. Always. And when he's not, I enjoy everything so much more. I guess I'll just have to deal with it, but it really gets on my nerves. All I wanna do is be close to her. He's a good friend, but I bring him EVERYWHERE with me. If she comes home with me, I'm sure I'll have to bring him too, unless I can find someone else, so the car is totally full and there's no room. I know he'll say yes to coming home, just because he's a bastard and doesn't have anything better to do than ruin my time. Not really, that's just the mad in me talking. He just doesn't have anything better to do. I wish he would just shove off for a couple days, just so I can get a break. I need a break. I also need some time alone with her. I should have already sealed the deal, but didn't. I just waited, you know, I'm not to eager anymore, it'll come, I'm not even worried about it.

I hate guitar hero, I hate it when he's around and there's no place to go. And I hate it when he plays guitar hero and sits in the room and there's nowhere for me to go. Nobody's awake. I also hate it when he copies me. One day, I was giving her a massage, and no less than 10 minutes after I was done, he was over there doing the same. I hate that shit. Its petty to say the least. Even if he's not trying to win her over, its still a dick move. I hate that shit.

Ok, I guess I'm done bitching now, sorry for it, but there's no one awake to talk to and I've got to write it somewhere.

One Thing

Don't you hate it when theres only one thing that you really want to do, but thats the only one thing that you really can't do? I hate that. It happens all too often, messes with your head. Its pretty frustrating.